Flippin' off the universe

I'm of the belief that life is really just a long sentence of hurt. Granted, there are periods of immense joy, happiness and good stuff, but overall it's really a fucked-up state of being. Those little positive pockets are what keep you going so you don't just say WTF and blow your fucking brains out.

Now this is based on my own life. I know there are people out there who have wonderful, fulfilling lives. Lives that are a long series of happiness with pockets of hurt. Well go you. My life hasn't been like that so I can't relate. I know that when I go through a period of happiness it's going to end. And it does. Especially when you think MAYBE this time it can stick around awhile.

So once again, it's time for me to pull back from everything, go into my cave and roll the rock in front and close myself off from the world. While I'm in there I'll pull out all the little happies so I won't go more insane than I already am.

I firmly believe in reincarnation. From the time I first heard about it as a kid I said "yeah, that makes perfect sense". I don't know what the fuck I did wrong in my past lives, what lesson I haven't learned - although I'm pretty close to narrowing it down - but this incarnation is FUCKED. Oh I know I've caused some of my own hurt, I take the blame for those. However the LEVEL and DURATION of hurt I've had to live with can only be ascribed to the universe saying FUCK YOU GREER SUCK ON THIS. I get that. I deal with it and keep on getting up every day and giving the universe the finger. Right now I'm still here.

But I am getting really, really tired.