Monkey Boy
Well today #3 son LCpl Tyler is 16.
This has been a LONG time coming. I only have 2 years left on my mom sentence.
If ever there was an accidental baby, Tyler would be it. For all intents and purposes my marriage was over, I hated my husband with the heat of a billion suns and was desperately looking for a way out. Of course he wasn't aware of any of this as I played the perfect wife. Like pregnancy #1, the asshole abused me while I was pregnant. When I went to the doctor and found out I was pregnant, I begged them to do the test over - I would have preferred cancer to a baby. Another child only lowered my chances of ever getting out of the hell I was in. But it wasn't to be, and I had what became the most controversial child yet.
Tyler is light enough to pass for white and has blonde hair and green eyes.
Yeah, I got an ass kicking for that one. My ex couldn't accept Tyler's coloring. His parents couldn't accept his coloring. The first time my former father-in-law held him, Tyler had his eyes closed. He said "Ah, look at the little redbone". Tyler opened his eyes and he said "Oh, my. His eyes." (What the fuck kind of statement is that? He isn't fucking Rosemary's Baby!) So for the first couple of years they all kept a close eye on Tyler to see if he looked like anyone else. They weren't shy about their "concerns" and I got so mad once I told them I'd be more than happy to have a paternity test done if they were so certain I was pawning off another man's kid on them. That pretty much shut them up, along with certain physical traits that manifested in Tyler that they all share. Fuckers.
Well things were so tense and so bad that I had a series of 2 nervous breakdowns right after he was born. Checked myself into a nuthouse, checked myself out after 24 hours (I realized I wasn't nutcakes, just fucking tired). I did go into therapy and went on Prozac. Tyler was 2 when the marriage fell completely apart and we divorced.
Blah, blah - joint custody. Blah, blah - no child support. Blah, blah - ex moved back to Ohio with his girlfriend. Blah, blah - oldest 2 went to live with the asshole cuz mom had to move us all to the 'hood and they were no longer suburbanites. But I kept Tyler. He's MY child.
The rest I've told at some point or another. We moved here to VA with the dead husband. Dead husband was the only father Tyler knew. Dead husband died. Tyler lost his mind for awhile. The Marines have knocked some sense into him. Things are markedly better.
I guess most of what I want to say is that Tyler is mine. 100% without question MY CHILD. I've made some horrible mistakes with him, but there are moments when I see the things I've tried to instill in him shine through. He has a very dry, very sharp sense of humor that comes from me. He can be very kind, generous and loving when the teenage angst is on the back burner. He doesn't have any prejudices that I can see. He's extremely competitive (another of my traits) especially if it's something he really likes. Most of all, and what I'm most proud of, is that Tyler is a feminist. Over the years he has said several times that "girls can do anything I can do except pee standing up, and I guess they can do that but their aim wouldn't be the same". Take THAT bitches!
Unfortunately, he has a temper that he can't control as well as he needs to in order to succeed in life. MCJROTC has helped some, but it's still there simmering under the surface. If there is one thing I wish for my son, it's that he learns to control that temper. I see difficult times for him if he doesn't.
So Happy Birthday Monkey Boy! Mommy loves you so much!
This has been a LONG time coming. I only have 2 years left on my mom sentence.
If ever there was an accidental baby, Tyler would be it. For all intents and purposes my marriage was over, I hated my husband with the heat of a billion suns and was desperately looking for a way out. Of course he wasn't aware of any of this as I played the perfect wife. Like pregnancy #1, the asshole abused me while I was pregnant. When I went to the doctor and found out I was pregnant, I begged them to do the test over - I would have preferred cancer to a baby. Another child only lowered my chances of ever getting out of the hell I was in. But it wasn't to be, and I had what became the most controversial child yet.
Tyler is light enough to pass for white and has blonde hair and green eyes.
Yeah, I got an ass kicking for that one. My ex couldn't accept Tyler's coloring. His parents couldn't accept his coloring. The first time my former father-in-law held him, Tyler had his eyes closed. He said "Ah, look at the little redbone". Tyler opened his eyes and he said "Oh, my. His eyes." (What the fuck kind of statement is that? He isn't fucking Rosemary's Baby!) So for the first couple of years they all kept a close eye on Tyler to see if he looked like anyone else. They weren't shy about their "concerns" and I got so mad once I told them I'd be more than happy to have a paternity test done if they were so certain I was pawning off another man's kid on them. That pretty much shut them up, along with certain physical traits that manifested in Tyler that they all share. Fuckers.
Well things were so tense and so bad that I had a series of 2 nervous breakdowns right after he was born. Checked myself into a nuthouse, checked myself out after 24 hours (I realized I wasn't nutcakes, just fucking tired). I did go into therapy and went on Prozac. Tyler was 2 when the marriage fell completely apart and we divorced.
Blah, blah - joint custody. Blah, blah - no child support. Blah, blah - ex moved back to Ohio with his girlfriend. Blah, blah - oldest 2 went to live with the asshole cuz mom had to move us all to the 'hood and they were no longer suburbanites. But I kept Tyler. He's MY child.
The rest I've told at some point or another. We moved here to VA with the dead husband. Dead husband was the only father Tyler knew. Dead husband died. Tyler lost his mind for awhile. The Marines have knocked some sense into him. Things are markedly better.
I guess most of what I want to say is that Tyler is mine. 100% without question MY CHILD. I've made some horrible mistakes with him, but there are moments when I see the things I've tried to instill in him shine through. He has a very dry, very sharp sense of humor that comes from me. He can be very kind, generous and loving when the teenage angst is on the back burner. He doesn't have any prejudices that I can see. He's extremely competitive (another of my traits) especially if it's something he really likes. Most of all, and what I'm most proud of, is that Tyler is a feminist. Over the years he has said several times that "girls can do anything I can do except pee standing up, and I guess they can do that but their aim wouldn't be the same". Take THAT bitches!
Unfortunately, he has a temper that he can't control as well as he needs to in order to succeed in life. MCJROTC has helped some, but it's still there simmering under the surface. If there is one thing I wish for my son, it's that he learns to control that temper. I see difficult times for him if he doesn't.
So Happy Birthday Monkey Boy! Mommy loves you so much!
posted by greer at
7:06 AM
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