Upon realizing I'm really a mean old lady

And don't give a damn.

That's right, I don't care that I'm evolving into a mean old lady. In fact, I'm reveling in it. I've spent my entire life giving a damn about other people, their lives, their happiness, their needs - I don't care anymore.

Now some of this stems directly from my future empty-nest. I can't wait for PFC Tyler to GET THE FUCK OUT. I'm tired of being a parent. It never was a job I actively pursued, TWA just didn't pull out in time and 9 mos later, there ya go. I did however, willingly accept the position once it was thrust on me, and did all I could to fulfill it as best as I could. But I'd like to retire from that now. I'd like to be in charge of just me.

Some of this comes from the various internet spaces I frequent. I'm tired of the pompous, the holier-than-thou, the idealogical zealots and the assholes. Really? You think you're all that? Mmkay. Your brand of feminism is better than mine? Get back with me when you're my age and actually lived a lifetime, little girl. God is going to punish me and I'm going to burn in hell? Not likely, I'm not a hypocrite and your version of him doesn't exist. Starting arguments with people just for the sake of arguing is all you got? Get a life, please. Black american folks are the most abused people on the planet? What are you, stupid?

So the Butterfly and I were comparing personality test results today and trying new ones and it's sad but true - I would be better off as a hermit in a cave with an army of the undead at my beck and call. Well I knew that, didn't need any silly old personality test to tell me. For the record, I'm an INTJ and an equal Type 5 & 8.

I used to like people. I used to like being around them, talking to them, getting to know them. The internet was a great way to do that. Yes, you take what they type with a grain of salt, but you're opening yourself up to the whole world. I think the longer I've been online though, the more insular I've become. I've realized that people really are fuckheads and I don't like fuckheads. In fact, I'd rather disassociate myself with everyone (except of course a very select few of which my children are not included). I'd definitely keep the Butterfly as he makes me laugh non-stop and the sex is great. I'm sitting here trying to add people to the list and sadly, I can't name anyone else. Sad, that. Obviously I only need laughter and sex from my fellow humans. On second thought, that's kinda funny.

So anyway yes, I'm becoming a mean old lady. If that's one of the roles of the Crone then I embrace it happily. At least it will keep all these damn kids off my lawn!